Til I Drop
by time.forgets
Summary: I stretched slowly; the reality that all the years, the hours and hours of endless training, the blisters, the pulled muscles, the tears, the sweat, the blood, all of it had lead up to this moment. This was it. I got ready to explode. AU Ballet
1. Chapter 1

**A.N. I know I'm bad for not writing the final chapter of No One Will Know but it will get done, I promise! About this story; in No One Will Know I showed you guys one interest of mine, one side if you will and with the release on Black Swan (totally awesome by the way) it kind of enthused me to put our favourite people in a kind of "Centre Stage" setting. You've (hopefully) read about Army Cadets Naomi and Emily so for a change of pace, here's our girls dancing.**

**Le me know if you like it/hate it and if the characters are kind of plausible or completely not even close to their real selves :) **

**Disclaimer: Okay, we all know what I'd to Emily if I owned her. We won't go there.**

* * *

1.

I stretched slowly; the reality that all the years, the hours and hours of endless training, the blisters, the pulled muscles, the tears, the sweat, the blood, all of it had lead up to this moment. I stepped out onto the audition floor with my heart racing, the sound of it echoing through my head. I took a deep breath in and let the thumping change time until it was beating away with the music that would be about to play. This was it. I got ready to explode.

"How much do you want this?" they asked me, their blank emotionless faces scaring me silly and making me wish Katie was beside me, bitchy perverted comments and all. _See that totally fit bloke on the left, well I'd definitely make sure I got some private lessons with him, yeah, _imaginary Katie whispered into my ear and a slight smile came over my face despite myself. I took a deep breath in again, trying to calm my racing heart and get my bearings back after showing my soul to them. I wiped the sweat running down the back of my neck, letting my response slip out without thinking about it.

"I don't want this," I told them, locking my eyes on imaginary Katie's fit guy. "I need this."

"Oi bitch!" Katie's voice echoed around the bustling change rooms. "How the fuck did you go?" I pulled her into a hug, letting the intense rush of emotions I had just felt out, letting her hold up my dead body.

"I think it went well," I replied, the response not seeming enough for the giant amount of excitement and adrenalin coursing through my body but it would have to do.

"Well that's great yeah but you stink Ems, now go shower before your sweat leaves a puddle on the floor." Sometimes you've got to love Katie. Actually, I think she could have called me an unnatural piece of shit and I still would have walked away with the same satisfaction. If the audition was good for nothing else I would at least know that there was such a high as this.

"When do you go in?" I asked her as I grabbed a towel from my bag, mopping my face and obscuring myself from seeing just how much she was shaking. "Three more girls, then me."

"You'll do great," I told her truthfully, picturing her perfect poise, face and turns in my head. "If anyone gets in it will definitely be you. You've got nothing to worry about." And just like that my good mood disappeared. I had done well in my audition but I knew that Katie would blow me out of the water. With the new sick feeling in the pit of my stomach I grabbed a bottle of water and my worn out pointe shoes and walked out the door.

* * *

"OH MY GOD I GOT A LETTER!" echoed around our house and I shot out of my bed with a start. _Shit,_ it was far too early to be hearing my sister's voice and it was then I realized with a sinking feeling that she didn't mean _a_ _letter_ but _the letter. _The letter we had both been waiting for week after painstaking week. My stomach dropped as I made myself walk into the kitchen, my usually light feet feeling like they'd been filled with lead.

"Oh I knew I would get in! How could they not let me in with the thirty fucking **fouettes **I did and on my left side too? Oh and Emily! Did you see the _totally_ fit bloke on the left? Definitely have to get a private lesson with him yeah."

I poured my cereal in a daze, letting Katie's non-stop exclamations wash over me, the sinking feeling I felt when I didn't see another letter on the table still low in my stomach and making the cheerios taste sour. I wanted to cry or maybe scream but I didn't because Katie got a letter and she would want me to be happy for her. I swallowed the last of cereal and looked up with a fake smile on my face.

"Congratulations Katie."

"Oh don't worry about that," she brushed off, walking airily to the door. "We need to start planning, boy are we going to take these mongs by force, right Ems?" I was confused and tired and sad and annoyed so when I heard the fateful 'we' she flung out there I almost snapped.

"We?"

"Duhh, you got in too. I opened your letter before. It's going to be so fucking good. I wonder if we'll share a room. Who am I kidding? I'll make sure we are. Ems? Emily?" She finally turned around to face me and boy I must have been a sight; stopped halfway through putting my bowl in the dishwasher and giant giddy smile slowly taking over my face. My heavy body was suddenly light as air and for just a moment, I thought I could do anything. If someone had asked me to jump off of a building right then I probably would have done it without a second thought.

"I got in?" I whispered, unable to get my voice to work anymore.

"Of course you did, you're a Fitch and were fucking amazing alright. Come on, we've got to go shopping for supplies!"

I walked over to the table in a daze, seeing the opened envelope in a pile with the rest. _Ms. Emily Fitch_ the front read and I didn't think I had ever seen my name written so perfectly. My hands were shaking as I pulled the wad of paper out and opened it slowly.

_Dear Ms Emily Fitch, we are pleased to inform you that due to your exemplary standard in the audition we would like to offer you a place in the London Premier School of Ballet. _

I couldn't contain my excitement any longer and chased Katie out the front door, running onto the street and leaping as high as I possibly could, following it with jump after jump, Katie's yelling my only music and my costume the dazzling pink fairies that adorned my pyjamas.

* * *

It was funny at first, the pure shock that she showed about actually getting in but as she continued dancing in the street in her fucking pyjamas it just got embarrassing. I tried yelling at her, telling her that while we were leaving it was a few weeks away and did she want _everyone_ thinking she was a complete minger? After a while of fruitless yelling I stormed back inside to find mum, excited to tell her about all my plans about what we would do in London, of all the musicals and ballets we would see and all of the fit boys we would meet.

With a final yell of 'Get the fuck in here bitch!" and a hard pull on her arm, Emily finally followed me inside to get ready. If we were going to go to this posh school in London then we were going to need to best equipment. My last pair of pointe shoes were looking a bit ratty anyway and I always needed a new leotard, not that I didn't look totally fabulous in my old ones but the store had just ordered in ones with diamantes.

I told Emily about our plans, about eating out every other night, dancing all day, surrounded by strong, fit dancing guys and it was on that point I was quite determined. What's-her-name and whatever thing Emily thought she had with her were staying back in Bristol and with my help I would get her a totally fit boyfriend so she and I could forget all about it. Once I got her away from the lezzer bitch everything would work out fine.

* * *

"Naomi darling," my mum called out from the kitchen and I nearly started banging my head on the door and the endearment. Only a few more weeks of this crap and I would be out of here one way or another. "There's a letter here for you!" I guess I was about to find out just which way that would be.

I grabbed a banana on the way through the kitchen, almost throwing it back up again as our resident nudist walked past in nothing but a fucking walkman before grabbing my letter off the top of the stack and heading out the door.

"I'm going out for a bit be back before tomorrow, don't wait up love you mum bye."

As soon as I was out of the house full of crazies I opened the letter, much more nervous then I would ever want to admit to myself. My hand shook but only slightly as I unfolded the first piece of paper. I sighed in relief, smiled tightly to myself before turning my head to the sky briefly and letting out a real smile, letting out the relief, the excitement and the joy about finally being able to leave this shitty town with my mother and her "communal living" ideas.

With a final glance at the endless blue, marred only by the ever present English clouds I kept on walking, keen to get fucked with my mates in celebration. I was ready for this, I didn't know what but I just knew that something would happen at the London Premier School of Ballet.

* * *

"Effy you got a letter," my mum called from downstairs. I looked at the door through a haze of smoke. I could go downstairs but I didn't really care what the letter said anyway. Probably just another bill anyway. "It says you got into some London Premier Ballet School. Effy! You never told me you were moving to London! When did you audition for this? Anyway, it says you got in; you start in a few weeks. Right posh school it looks too."

She kept on talking, her voice blending into the music from my speakers. I thought about moving away from her, from the fucked up world my life had become. I smirked and took another drag of my cigarette.

"Sweet."

* * *

**/hides behind chair and anxiously waits your opinion. Also, it is rather terrifying writing from Katie Fitch's POV.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A.N. Sooo I said I had been working on this one and look! A chapter for you guys! :) Anwyay, this one is still a little jumpy- it's introducing everyone and the school and everything so once we get into it the chapters will probably be all from the one person's point of view but for now it jumps a little. I hope you like it, I delved further into Katie's POV this time AND I'M STILL NERVOUS. Yep, she really scares me...anyway- read, enjoy (maybe?) and leave a review before you go (please?).**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters but I do own _The London Premier School of Ballet_...unless there is actually one called that, then this is really awkward. **

* * *

_Emily POV_

I had only been to London once before and never without my parents, so while stepping out of the unbelievably crowded airport had been exhilarating, I was exponentially glad I had Katie with me because I was scared shitless. All the buildings were huge and old and beautiful and there were so many people just milling about; going to work, on a break, tourists. Everywhere I looked there were people filling up spaces, police driving past in minivans and kids running and screaming.

As we pulled up outside the building I was immeasurably glad I was a twin. I had planned to come to the school as Emily. Not as Katie's twin, not as shy, pathetic, lonely little _other_ Fitch but as my own person. I felt that conviction shrivel up as I saw the kinds of people walking in and out of the door. I hadn't even stepped inside a studio yet I could see that I stood out like a sore thumb here.

Tall, tiny waists, tiny hips, tiny everything was all I could see. Girls who were indisputably beautiful but were the total opposite of me. They were all alike, blonde sleek hair and legs that went on for miles. I looked back at Katie who was watching the taxi driver get out all her stuff and I became even more panicky. I was thin back at my old school but here I felt stocky, almost fat and the softness that I had in my hips and chest, what usually caused guys eyes to rove slowly across my body were attracting looks so far away from appreciative that I blushed and tried to draw into myself.

"Oi let's go bitch," Katie called out, wheeling her giant suitcase onto the pavement. I wondered if she could yell at me any louder and suddenly the anonymity that I had tried to get rid of my whole life felt like the best thing in the world; if only I knew how to get it back. I tucked a strand of bright red hair behind my ear, the cool metal of my piercings comforting me slightly until I realized how far apart from everyone else they set me. I sucked a big breath in and dodged yet another curious gaze, this time from a _tall, thin, perfect_ brunette girl leaning against the wall. Smoke from her cigarette obscured her blue eyes slightly but I thought I saw a flash of something other than disbelief and disdain. I wondered for a second if she didn't fit in with the rest of these girls either but then I looked at her properly again. Tall, thin, perfect and I knew that couldn't be the case.

I hadn't even made it inside but suddenly this year felt like the longest year ever.

"Hurry up loser," Katie yelled out, her lisp so apparent and I wondered if there was any other way we could stand out. I dropped my gaze from the smoking girl as she started to smirk and hurried after my sister.

I had finally managed to shake off Katie after she had found we were in different rooms and was taking a deep breath in as I stood outside my door. 12B, the number said so perfectly that I was a little afraid to open the door, afraid to see who I would be living with for the next year. I wondered if she'd be tall and blonde and perfect and my eyes dropped to the ground but then wondered if she'd be able to do as many fouettés as me or if her ponche was as high as mine and I breathed a little easier. I gripped the door handle. It was smooth and cold and full of potential.

_I wonder if she's gay,_ a tiny voice in my head piped up and I squashed the thought down, guiltily looking around as if someone could tell what I just thought. I turned the handle.

The first thing I saw was legs. Long, pale, soft looking legs. I gulped as my eyes travelled up, taking slightly longer to reach the girls face than usual etiquette. I hope she hadn't noticed.

Blue eyes, a smirk; half hidden behind a cloud of smoke. She had.

"Checking me out again then?" The way she said it didn't make it sound like a question and I blushed such a deep red that I probably matched my hair. It wasn't fair, she couldn't sit around in nothing but very small underwear and a t-shirt and not expect me to stare at least a little. I forced myself to look at her eyes and only her eyes.

I breathed in sharply when I was met with the storm there. I wanted to say I wasn't thinking about her that way, that my mind wasn't instantly flicking to what it would be like to kiss her smirking lips, or to see if her legs were as soft as they looked but it was. Her gaze didn't waver and I felt like all my secrets were spilling out of my eyes, like she could tell everything I was thinking; about her, about Katie and about all the other girls here so I blinked once, my eyes scattering around the room nervously.

"No, of course," I said, trying to sound offended or mad but my voice went too husky for that and so I settled for dumping my stuff on the other bed and ignoring her mysterious, unsettling presence.

"Don't worry, I won't tell. Want a hit?" Huh, I thought the smell had been particularly…strong and I wandered over to where she was holding the joint elegantly between two fingers. I thought about Katie and how she had always yelled at me if I even sniffed too hard when a cigarette was being tossed around. I thought about Katie and her insistence that I never ever went near drugs of any kind and then I thought of my goal. Starting new, being Emily and doing what I wanted to do.

"Okay."

I breathed in deeply, the swirly thick smoke filling my mouth. It tasted…weird…different to anything I had tasted before and I wanted to keep it in my mouth a little longer to try and figure out what it was but the girl, still not wearing pants, sat up and pressed her hand against my chest.

"Now breathe in again, to bring it in here." I hope she didn't notice the way my heart thudded a bit harder, I imagined her moving her hand over, just an inch; what it would feel like.

"Now breathe out."

I laughed, elated that I had just smoked for the first time and went to take another drag but cool, slim fingers grabbed it before it reached my mouth. I pouted but figured maybe it would be best to pace myself, we had some big introductory meeting later on and I was already dreading it.

We smoked the rest of the joint in an easy silence, my roommate doing most of the smoking of course until most of the smoke had risen and I was surprised that we didn't have all kinds of authority knocking on our door for the smell.

I smiled when heard high heels clicking down the hall in a distinctive timing. Short person timing. Katie. I knew that her seeing me like this would not be good but I found myself smiling anyway. Not because I felt so high and everything was funny but rather because everything seemed easy. All the worry I had before about the tiny, skinny girls had been pushed to the back of my head, worry about being in Katie's shadow, worry about Katie walking in on this; none of it seemed like that big of a deal. I was starting to like my roommate more and more despite her unnerving silences and weird stares. The fact that she was extremely easy on the eyes also might have had something to do with it.

"You wouldn't believe the dykey bitch I have to share my room with…" Katie's voice said, muffled until she pushed open the door. I winced at her words but the slight pain was gone within a second and the lazy mood I was in returned. "Is that weed?" Her voice was so shrill, her question so insistent but instead of answering I smiled nervously, blue eyes catching mine across the room lazily. She did an almost unnoticeable eye roll and I couldn't hold back a giggle. Katie must have thought I was nuts or a lot higher than I was.

"You smoked week!" she yelled at me, her voice getting even louder and higher. "You're away from home for a minute and already you're hanging out with stoners!"

"Who's this?" the mysterious brunette asked me, her voice as smoky as the room. She offered me another cigarette, although not weed from the smell of it. I wondered if she ever stopped smoking.

"I'm Katie fucking Fitch who the fuck are you?"

* * *

_Naomi_

I had already tuned out her annoying little rant (something about personal and closet space) and was idly trying to blow smoke rings (it never seemed to work though). The first thought on my roommate entering was that she'd probably look more at home at Hooters; push up bra, short skirt, stilettos, the whole deal. I felt like telling her this was a ballet academy but if she wanted to flash her tits who was I to stop her? (It wasn't that they were nice to look at. Why would I think that?)

A deep drag on my cigarette calmed me down and I laughed internally at my promise to quit. I guess being away from my friends and house full of hippies hadn't been as calming and refreshing as I had hoped and from the looks of my roommate who was still prattling on (something about boys) I wasn't going to be stopping anytime soon (better blame it on her than on an addiction that I definitely didn't have).

"I'm Naomi," I said suddenly, my voice sounding slightly foreign to my ears. I hadn't talked much in the few weeks before I left (I tried to not think about my mum's face as I said a terse _I'll miss you_ at the airport). Hooter's looked up, possibly startled that I'd interrupted her. I guess she was quite pretty, not in the usual ballet dancers' way (thin, no hips or chest and similar smiling faces). She was…harsh, she looked like she could take me in a fight and I smiled for the first time that day.

"Katie," she replied and I took the information in with another drag on my cigarette, tuning out her incessant (lisp?) voice bouncing around the room. I looked her over once again, annoyed that I had to spend time in a confined space with _Katie_, the girl who never shut up. My eyes roamed over her body again, I knew that any shaped dancer could be good but from what I had seen, everyone here had size four bodies and were taller than…well, her. My gaze lingered on her chest; how did she dance with those?

She stopped talking for a moment and I vaguely noticed the loss of background noise (was she still talking about guys?), my blue eyes swiveling up to meet her dark ones.

"Fucking lezzer!" she squawked as she stormed out of the room and if she was going to be totally insolent about it then I didn't feel the need to tell her I wasn't. I loved goading people like her; I wondered if I could change her ideals by the end of the year at all. My eyes fell onto her giant suitcase, surrounded by heavy, expensive looking bags and then onto the ratty pig t-shirt I was wearing. I didn't think I could.

* * *

_Katie POV_

"Alongside a timetable of intensive ballet training, students will also study Pas de deux, solos, repertoire, character, contemporary, stagecraft, and make-up, with male students doing body conditioning and weight training. This road is not the easiest road to travel and you have all been picked because you are the best. I refuse to see any of you perform less than outstanding at any time and if you waste my, or any of your teachers' time then you will be asked to leave. At the end of the semester you will have a workshop performance. The roles for this showcase will be chosen based not only on audition but on your performance and attitude in your classes. I expect all of you to try to get lead roles and if I hear of anyone slacking off or not putting one-hundred and ten percent into every lesson then we will have words.

This is _the_ most competitive school and we have picked you because you are the best. This may seem like the dream, that now that you're here you can take a step back but no, this is only the beginning. You have a long road ahead of you, don't disappoint me."

Ems looked over at me and smiled a tight nervous smile. I threw one back in her direction but mine was filled with something else; excitement. Pep talks, especially horrible disheartening ones like the one we just sat through, always got me excited and I was pumped to actually start dancing. I could feel the muscles in my legs twitch in eagerness.

I frowned as Emily leant over to whisper something into _Effy's_ ear. Mysterious, skinny, drugged up, ragged and probably lesbo Effy. I felt my twin protectiveness come over me and I wanted to march right over and rip Emily from that controlling bitch's clutches. The pair didn't notice my glare, Emily too busy giggling and ducking her head and Effy too busy being all 'fit and mysterious'. I scoffed and looked around the room, trying to figure out who was going to be queen bee, who I was going to be friends with.

I couldn't see anyone and coming from me that was odd. I had many skills but one of which was being able to pick 'that' person. The one who everyone strived to be, the one who everybody whispered about through lunch and the one who could make boys flock around her with a flick of their hair but here, in the large slightly smelly dance room I couldn't find any. I smiled, the plans building up in my head; this was definitely my chance. I had Emily and if the lezzer bitch roommate of mine had any sense she'd follow me too. As the director prattled on about what was banned; alcohol, drugs, porn and sex, I started to rearrange my character. It was a subtle art, making yourself seem taller when you were short, making yourself seem confident when you were inwardly cringing at the average size of the other girls and giving off that air that made guys slow down as they walked to simply look at you.

I was proud of what I was portraying and my confidence levels were going through the roof when I looked over Emily and Effy. The tall, dark girl was whispering once again but I wasn't focussed on that but at all the skinny bitches around her. They were all leaning in, like listening to what she was whispering to Emily was more important than whatever the director was prattling on about now. I was mad because without even meaning to, and with being a flat chested, drug smoking dyke, she had just shot up to queen bee.

"So take all your measurements, fill them in on the sheet given. These will be taken every couple of months so we can monitor any growth and to make sure if we have a corps de ballet they are all the right height." _And to make sure no one get fat_, he may as well have added. "Tape measures are going around and there are scales in the corner. I want this done efficiently, so no mucking around."

I continued to project my confident aura but my eyes were scanning wildly for Emily. I wasn't blind, I had already seen that we didn't fit in at all here and from her panicking gaze I knew she was dreading this little measuring activity as much as I was. I looked down at my sports bra encased breasts and then across the multitudes of completely flat girls around me. I took a deep breath in; I knew what I was going to have to do.

"Hey Effy," I crooned, smiling my best cute girl smile all the while keeping my eyes dark and angry. "Come on we'll grab a tape measure to share."

* * *

_Emily POV_

I was panicking. I was panicking a lot but Katie didn't seem to be affected by this at all and I knew that when I got on the scales it wouldn't read the same numbers as the all the tiny girls around me. I searched for Katie nervously but she was over in the corner with Effy and it was that moment I realised that being at this ballet school was going to be no different to Bristol. Katie would buddy up with Effy, aloof, commanding, popular and I would be left in her shadow. Odd, quiet, little Emily. I huffed grumpily for a second and wheeled around to go find the scales.

It beeped in front of me, the girl climbing off and writing a value on her little sheet of paper. I tried to not look, I really did but I did and what I saw made me duck my head. I wanted to disappear.

_98 pounds._

I would not be 98 pounds and I would have been half a head shorter than the girl who was now running over to the table of measuring tapes to measure her flat chest and tiny hips. I turned back to the scales and breathed out. I would be fine, I clearly deserved to be here or else they wouldn't have picked me. I clearly had the talent and that was all that mattered.

"Hurry up Katiekins, you're holding up the line," a harsh voice called from behind me. I looked over at Katie, seeing her laughing overly loudly to something Effy had said. I felt replaced and then confused. Katie wasn't holding anyone up.

"Oi, could you get a move on?" And then I turned around to see a girl yelling at me. Not just a girl, the most beautiful, breathtaking girl ever and as her clear blue eyes lit up in shock when she saw my face, saw I wasn't Katie and then softened, I knew I was in trouble.

Yep, this was going to be exactly like Bristol.

* * *

**A.N. Thoughts? Want to see something in future chapters? Drop us a review and I'll do my best :) In the next few chapters there's going to be more actual dancing and so I want to know if you guys want a bit of the ballet terminology (so those who maybe know it have a better idea) or to just leave it out (so I don't confuse everyone with weird French terms...)**


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